Golf is Such an
Easy Game
Words &
music by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
The problem is all in
your backswing, it’s plain to see
You’ll hit the ball much further if you’ll swing more easily
If you will let me show you, I can help you break ninety
You’ll find that Golf is Such an Easy Game
Be sure to keep your left arm straight, keep your right elbow in
Flex your knees, bend at the waist, and keep the ball beneath your chin
Now stick your butt out, keep your head down, but most of all…relax
You’ll find that Golf is Such an Easy Game
You gotta putt like
Jack, charge like Arnie, swing it smooth just like Ernie
Be like Ben and dig your game out of the range
Be Dalyesque and crush that driver, concentrate just like Tiger
You’ll find that Golf is Such an Easy Game
All you gotta do is hit that fade like Trevino, play that draw just like Sergio
Hit it straight, Byron Nelsons claim to fame
Get outa that rough just like Seve, flop that wedge just like Lefty, and you’ll
find
Golf is such an easy game
Golf is such an easy Game
Now you have to shift
your weight, or you will hit it fat or thin
Your swing-plane has to be consistent from the beginning to the end
Don’t over pronate, and remember that it’s all about the Zen
And you’ll find that Golf is Such an Easy Game
Finally, make sure that you
complete your follow through
Your hips must face the target, or the shot will go askew
And remember not to think at all while swinging
And then you will see that Golf is Such an Easy Game
repeat chorus
Golfing in Paridise
Words &
music by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
Blue sky, a warm breeze, green grass and tall trees
Five different sets of tees, three good friends, and I
A jet plane took us away from our crazy workin’
day
A
vacation getaway just swingin’ under sunny skies
Beautiful in every way…We take a look around and say
We're golfing in paradise, we're golfing in
paradise
Even bad shots look so nice when you’re golfin’ in...
When you’re golfin’ in...when you’re golfin’ in Paradise
It's a brand new designer track by Tom Fazio,
Pete Dye, and Jack
But we’re willing to give it a crack ya, we’re gonna give it a try
Everybody turn off your cell phones, we’re gonna leave that busy world at home
We’re gonna try and find that zone and beat all the other guys
Buy a brand new putter from the pro shop and watch those birdies drop
Chorus
In the evening when the sun goes
down...margaritas all around
We’ll listen to the soothing sound of waves lapping on the shore
Tomorrow we’ll be out on the course again, we’ll make our bets, and we’ll play
to win
But we’ll be wearing a big ol’ grin no matter what our score
The dress code at this resort is straw hats and Bermuda shorts
Chorus
My Friend Mulligan
Words &
music by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
Let me introduce you to my friend Mulligan, he will let you hit that shot again
Just don’t hook or slice or skull again, cuz you only get one mulligan
He's a golfer born in Ireland, he will help you every chance he can
He’s a real humanitarian, just a heckuva guy
If you hit a nasty looking slice on the first tee, you don’t have to pay the
price
Mulligan will make the sacrifice, he won’t even ask why
Chorus
Golfers know this game is difficult...ugly scores and bad shots can result
But there’s a man with whom you can consult...you should give him a try
You will find he travels everywhere helping golfers out of their despair
You can hit your tee shot anywhere, swing hard and let the ball fly
Chorus
Now Mulligan knows that it's against the rules, so he knows you've got to play
it cool
When you’re keeping score, he knows that you’ll play the ball as it lies
If you take this game too serious it can make your brain delirious
Finding help is not mysterious, Mulliigan is your guy
The One Putt Strut
Words & music by Glen
Everhart
Copyright 2006
When it comes to
golf, I’m not real good...it isn’t very hard to see
I swing with all my might, I try to hit it outa sight, but barely make it to the
ladies tee
But even I get lucky every once in awhile
and
hit a shot that would make a pro proud
So be ready if it happens when I’m playin’ with you
because
I might get kinda loud
I do the birdie
boogie, I do the one putt strut
Anyone who’s watchin’ thinks that I’m a nut
I try to be like Tiger and throw an uppercut
I do the birdie boogie, I do the one putt strut
When good shots
are few and far between I gotta party when I get the chance
So I pump my fist high into the air and I do my little dance
Like a wide receiver in the NFL who just caught himself a touchdown pass
I whirl my putter around, I jump up and down, you oughta see me shake that grass
Chorus
So the next time
you’re having lousy round
just
take a little tip from me
Throwing clubs and cussin’ loud is just a waste of energy
Just wait until your game starts to come around,
and
you’re swingin’ like you have a clue
And when you finally hit that perfect shot, you're gonna know just what to do
You'll
do the
birdie boogie, you'll do the one putt strut
Anyone who’s watchin’ will think that you're a nut
You're gonna be like Tiger and throw an uppercut
You'll
do the birdie boogie, you'll do the one putt strut
You'll
do the birdie boogie, you'll do the one putt strut
You'll
do the birdie boogie, you'll do
the one putt strut
Welcome to the Big Tour
Words
& music by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
It
breaks left, then right, a million dollars on the line
Downhill, down grain, this kinda speed is insane
Your heart pounds, your mind races, the gallery is just a sea of faces
You tune ‘em out, focus in, you live for that roar when it goes in
Welcome to
the big tour…welcome to the big tour
The glory is the big lure…Welcome to the big tour
Pinehurst,
Bethpage Black, The TPC at Sawgrass
Pebble Beach, Whistling Straights, they’re gonna show you how you rate
To get through the Q-school
you
gotta have more than just the physical tools
You need heart, you need guts,
but
most of all you better make putts
Chorus
The big
hitters are the best, they put your game to the test
The big names are big time, you know they’re gonna lay it on the line
The back nine
on Sunday is when the winners come to play
Out here it’s understood that every player is so damn good
You gotta stay steady, stay cool, stay in the moment is the rule
Hit the fairways and fire at the pin, you’re nobody until you win
Chorus
Be The Ball
Words & music
by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
Caddyshack is the funniest movie of all time
Any golfer worth his handicap can quote every line
But my favorite one is from Chevy Chase
One that each and every golfer should embrace
Though it’s hard to know exactly just what he meant
He was wise, to the point, and eloquent…he said
Be the ball, Danny (be the ball Danny), Be the ball, Danny (be that ball)
Just let it flow Danny, you’re trying way to hard
Be the ball, Danny (be the ball Danny), Be the ball, Danny (be that ball)
Be the ball, Danny or you’ll end up in the lumberyard
He said na na na
na na na (na na na na na na),
Wa
wa wa wa wa (wa wa wa wa wa wa)
Be the ball
Danny or you'll end up in the lumber yard
Greenskeeper
Carl had a gopher killin’ plan
Danny Noonan
was a caddie and a ladies man
Now, we know
Judge Schmails was a tremendous slouch
Lacy did her
best work on the couch
But Ty was
sly, the smartest of them all
He knew the
secret of life is to Be That Ball, he said
Chorus
Now life can
give you trouble every now and then
It’s best to
keep things as simple as a person can
If you try
too hard, you know you’re bound to fail
You’ll spend
your time chasing your own tail
So remember,
next time you’re about to fall
Just close
your eyes, Danny, and be that ball
Chorus
Slackin’ & Hackin’
Words & music
by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
The sun is shinin’…my boss is gone
On a day like this, there’s only one place I belong
Slackin’ & hackin’ is the perfect way to spend a day
I’ll call my buddies, they’re tired of workin’ too
A day off for golfin’ is way overdue
Slackin’ & hackin’ is the perfect way to spend a day
I’ll just take an early lunch and won’t come back at all
Who’s really gonna care if I go hit that little ball?
I might see by boss while I’m out there on the links
But she’ll probably smile and give a little wink
Because the days
are getting’ warmer, and spring is in the air
I know they’re just excuses, but I don’t really care
Slackin’ & hackin’ is the perfect way to spend a day
I’ll just take an early lunch and won’t come back at all
Who’s really gonna care if I go hit that little ball?
I might see by boss while I’m out there on the links
But she’ll probably smile and give a little wink
The sun is shinin’,
the winter’s finally done
On a day like this, I deserve a little fun
Slackin’ & hackin’ is the perfect way to spend a day
Slackin’ & hackin’ what a perfect way to spend a day
Slackin’ & hackin’ is the perfect way to spend a day
The Dream
Words
& music by Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
It was early afternoon last Sunday, I topped off a big lunch with a Milky Way
And sat down to watch the US Open on my big TV
Well, you know the final round can last forever, so I grabbed a pillow and
fluffed up the feathers
And I put my feet up high and fell asleep
It was then that I had this crazy dream that I was warming up on the practice
green
Getting ready to play against none other than Tiger Woods
The U.S. Open was on the line, so Tiger shook my hand and looked me in the eye
And wished me luck just like a fellow golfer should
Well, Tiger had the honors on the first tee and he striped it so far that even
he
Flashed a big ol’ smile when it landed in the short grass
Now, I was sure I was gonna hit a worm burner so I gripped my driver a little
bit firmer
And hit a weak slice into the rough and got outa there fast
Well, of course we got to my ball first, and I overcooked a five iron and let
out a curse
And begged my ball to bite or get a members bounce
But lucky for me it stayed on the back of the dance floor and two tricky putts
later I had my four
But I was sure I’d opened the door for Tiger to pounce
He had a birdie putt that was inside the leather but when he lipped it out I
didn’t know whether to say
"Nice Try” or just keep my mouth shut
Boy, Tiger was steaming when he got to the tee so he took a big rip but he hit
it O.B.
But I hit the fairway, the green, and had another two-putt
It went on that way for the whole front nine I was makin’ pars and swingin’ fine
But Tiger scramblin’ and struggling just to stay within reach
So when we made the turn, I was ahead by three in the U.S. Open, who woulda
believed
That I’d be leading on Sunday afternoon at Pebble Beach?
But I foolishly swung for the flag on Ten even though I knew it was a sucker pin
I caught it thin and it plugged in the sand on the short side
Well opportunity knocked and Tiger let loose, he hit his approach with so much
juice
It spun back into the hole, I made a bogey, and just like that, we were tied
I started looking around for the cart girl cuz I was getting so nervous, I
wanted to hurl
And I was thinkin’ a beer or three might calm me down
But of course she was nowhere in sight so I just ripped my drive with all my
might
And it landed center cut, my best drive of the whole round
Well, for the rest of the round Tiger and I played the very best golf of both
our lives
The gallery was screamin’ “You da Man” and assorted shouts
On the eighteenth tee, we were still tied and Tiger looked at me with a smile so
wide
And said, “Glen, this is what it’s all about”
We both had birdie putts to win it all and when mine went in, and Tiger’s didn’t
fall
I was the most unlikely winner of the U.S. Open Championship
But, remember, this whole story was just a dream and when I woke up and saw the
TV screen
And Johnny Miller was standing there giving me a golf tip
Ya, Tiger had won by 13 strokes, and I was still an ordinary bloke
Who couldn’t beat Tiger Woods if he gave me thirty shots
But I love the game, and even though I’m a hack I grew up cheering for Arnie and
Jack
And I still watch them every chance I get in my double-wide
So I went out that night to the practice range
And a thought occurred to me that was kinda strange
As I was pounding slices offa one of those plastic tees
Ya, I wondered if someone as great as Tiger Woods
Who advertises Buicks and plays so good
Ever takes a nap and dreams about beating me…
The Chance to Shoot His Age
Words & music by
Glen Everhart
Copyright 2006
On the o
On the
Old Course on the first tee
There’s
an old man with a big dream
As he
looks out upon the North Sea
He
hopes today’s the day
It was
last fall when he last played
But
hope springs anew when winter fades
And
there’s still time for a last crusade
The
chance to shoot his age
To the
young men, he’s the old sage
He
still beats them good on his better days
And
this course he loves would be a grand stage
For him
to shoot his age
He’s
come real close a couple times
But
then the Gales blew in from the coastline
Now his
life is deep into the back nine
So
he’ll play every day
This
game born in the Scottish land
Keeps
calling him back time and again
And
this course is his beloved friend
So
he’ll play every day
He tees the ball in the damp ground
He
takes a deep breath and has a look around
And
when he feels that hit, and he hears that sound
He’s
grateful for the day, and the chance to shoot his age
Well, let me tell you a story of my buddy and his golf tournament
held annually
It’s the Open…the coveted Baney Open…
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
My friend said to me “Golf is a riddle”, then he smashed his ball
right down the middle
Of the fairway on the first hole of the Baney Open…
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
When I stood there on the very first tee
there
was a crowd of people watching me
I was gropin’ with the pressure of the Baney Open
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
I parred the first, the second and third, then on the fourth hole
I made a bird
I was dreamin’ of wearing the mustard yellow jacket
The one that’s worn by the winner with the beer stains on the pocket
I got through the front nine in thirty-seven and I felt like I
was on the fairway to heaven
I was copin’ with the pressure of the Baney Open…
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
Well to make a long story even longer, my game was feeling
stronger and stronger
I was gloatin’, gloatin’ in the Baney Open
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
But then I hooked a drive deep into the rough and after that,
well the wheels fell off
I was chokin’, chokin in the Baney Open…
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
I octupled in for a ninety three, then I bent my putter around a
tree
I was mopin’, mopin’ in the Baney Open…
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
Now the moral of this story here is don’t try so hard just drink
more beer
When you’re golfin’, golfin’ in the Baney Open
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
I’m prob’ly never gonna win it but there’s really nothin’ wrong with hopin’
Trouble in the Gorse
Words & music by Glen
Everhart
Copyright 2006
This is the
tale of Old Carnoustie, a tale of pain and woe
How good John Van De Velde, the Frenchman golfin’ pro
Did let the cherished Claret Jug slip right through his ready hands
To the hands of one Paul Lawrie, the son of Ireland
Remember,
when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
Twas at the British Open back in ninety-nine
Van De Velde led on Sunday all thru the inward nine
And comin’ to the home hole, his lead still stood at three
And crowning him the champion was a formality
Remember,
when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
But playing
safe was simply not in the Frenchman’s blood
The gallery was dumbfounded when he took his driving wood
And swung it like a hero, but hit it less than pure
And when he missed the narrow fairway, he knew one thing for sure
Remember,
when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
But Irish
luck was with him that dark and windy day
His ball was found unfettered, and the green two shots away
But he chose his longest iron instead of the safe play
And hit it in the tall grass thick as farmers hay
Remember,
when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
He hacked it
from the heather into a watery grave
He nearly tried to play it, his ego for to save
But he took a drop and wedged it out into the sandy trap
He got it up and down, but he was still a sorry chap
Remember,
when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
In the
ensuing playoff, Paul Lawrie was the best
His Ireland embraced him as the winner of the test
John Van De Velde was left to ponder all that might have been
Now the ghosts of Old Carnoustie will haunt him ‘til the end
Remember,
when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
Remember, when you’re golfin’ on a British Open course
You’d better keep it in the fairway, cuz there’s trouble in the gorse
Chorus